The best communication occurs with an even and equal exchange between two people. Getting to know someone new is like peeling an onion one thin layer at the time. But some people, overeager to get into deep and meaningful conversation, go too far too fast.
This is torture.” She thinks, “Why doesn’t he ask me any questions? But the ability to speak is only one part of the equation—and not the most important part.
A man and woman face each other across a table at a downtown bistro, looking nervous and awkward. There is a stiff formality to the way they sit—no slouching. In reality, premature or exaggerated revelations are due more to boundary issues, unresolved pain, or self-centeredness than true intimacy. Maybe your first date questions will lead you to discover that this person is your soul mate—or maybe not.
All the observable and obvious clues: They are nicely groomed and wearing freshly pressed clothes—stylish, but not overdone. Should the relationship evolve, there will be plenty of time to get into weighty topics. When a person reveals too much too soon, it can give a false sense of intimacy.
Some people consider themselves skilled communicators because they can talk endlessly.
Biggest clue of all: The salad course is punctuated by strained silence and forced small talk. Great communication starts with being genuinely interested in the individual you’re with and paying close attention to what he/she says. (aka, "Why are you single: The Remix)This is one of those backhanded compliments that really has no response. As a Plus-Size Princess, I often wonder if the guys asking me out have dated big girls before (not that it matters, but I do wonder), and I’ve learned that the answer is rarely helpful.When men say this to me, it makes me feel like something is wrong with me — especially because 99% of the men who use corny lines like this will not make any moves to take me off the market. If his last three girlfriends looked like Jennifer Lopez, I may feel insecure, but if his last three girlfriends looked like Rebel Wilson, I might wonder if he’s a chubby chaser.No one wants to date some one who does not talk, is boring or nervous. So dating experts advise that short of having a paper full of questions, you must be ready with a list of interesting, impressive and enjoyable questions that will keep the conversation thriving in those five-ten minutes. One thing you really don’t have is the luxury of time. The trick is to select from among these the questions that are closest to your heart and whose answers are important to you.